so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
