3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
