her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize