i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
