just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
