You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You pole danced in your parka.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
