Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
handjob tips. give me some.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize