But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
