Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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