Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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