hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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