Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
The police scanner is talking about you again....
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
