Yo dont text me then not text me
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
