Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
