you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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