I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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