Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize