I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
