If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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