Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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