i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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