Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Randomize