I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
