This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
