dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
