So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
