office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
