just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Randomize
