i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
