With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
