I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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