We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
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