another moral hangover. fuck.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I faked an abortion last night.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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