therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize