I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
The struggles of a small town man whore
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
