Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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