Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
