ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize