he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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