Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
