My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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