Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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