I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
