**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize