How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
