all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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