I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
