yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Congratulations! We have a period
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
