I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
