He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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