Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
