I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize